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How to Use Masculine Energy to Enhance Feminine Energy

May 17, 2021 by Billy Samoa Saleebey
General
amy stanton, Authentic, CEO, Emotions, Feminine, Femininity, Founder, Masculine

• Where do gender expressions come from?

• Who defines them?

• What are the benefits of using masculine and feminine energies?

To discuss the divine feminine energy, we talked with Amy Stanton, author of The Feminine Revolution. 

Amy is her own boss, all the way across the board. After leaving California and moving to New York, fuel was added to her fire, proving to be a formative time in her life. In New York, a fast moving metropolitan area, comfort and steadiness are hard to find. It’s a constant uphill battle, balancing survival and work. Amy Stanton was up for the challenge. 

Stanton was Head of Marketing and Communications for the 2012 NYC Olympic Bid. This is where she met Dan and Jay, both of whom she worked with extensively. Stanton describes the deep sense of respect and understanding that existed between her and the two men. Dan came from a hedge fund background and Jay came from politics and media, so essentially, they were both intense powerhouses themselves. She worked herself tirelessly for them, but the work was based on a profound respect each side had for the other. Dan and Jay accepted and acknowledged Amy’s dedication to her work and the emotions that came with it.

Over the course of her career, Stanton worked for a variety of bosses. In doing so, she started to recognize noticeable differences between the reception of masculine and feminine energies in the workplace. Stanton initially regarded some female bosses as “nitpicky,” “petty,” and “jealous,” all of which are labels often given to women. Alternatively, men were not given equivalent labels. 

Contrary to viewing crying and being sensitive as negative, Amy encourages embracement. Exploring the root cause of emotions can allow individuals to form deeper connections. In a workplace setting, employers and employees can ask questions and engage in open dialogue to understand one another better. This could make the difference between someone quitting and someone excelling at work.

Amy drives home the point that feminine qualities are not weaknesses, but instead, they are superpowers. Femininity is a source of power but is often mistaken for the opposite. As the author of The Feminine Revolution, Amy Stanton digs deep into the power dynamics of masculinity and femininity. Amy initially felt she wasn’t showing up completely at work, and being in a corporate setting in New York City didn’t help as emotions and sensitivity are not necessarily embraced. As a result, Stanton had to be more direct and assertive to thrive in a “man’s world.” For a while, this worked. Amy recalls her peers perceiving her as tough. More so, she felt she had the feminine qualities beaten out of her.

This poses a question: why do we hold parts of ourselves back? Stanton goes on to suggest that we hide certain aspects of ourselves that we feel aren’t welcome in certain spaces. This ultimately leads to a misinterpretation of character and the possibility of someone feeling restricted as they can’t be their true selves. 

After her time working on the 2012 New York Olympic Bid, Amy Stanton went on to work with Martha Stewart and became the first chief marketing officer (CMO) for her brand. Stanton fondly describes her time working with Martha Stewart, also noting that she thinks Stewart is a visionary. Stewart’s brand and omnimedia concept has influenced many other celebrities to do the same. 

Working with Martha, Amy learned that femininity is not one size fits all. She recalled Stewart’s management style being extremely direct. This can be coded as a masculine trait. It is something a lot of women executives feel the need to adopt, despite the fact it is rarely seen as a positive trait. Stanton learned how curious and genuinely interested Martha Stewart was in every aspect of her life. She recalls the story of the first time Martha Stewart went to Costco. Stewart had never been in her life. But upon arrival, Stanton was amazed by how Stewart received everything there, with a sense of wonderment and intent. And Amy then realized how Martha Stewart presented her feminine and masculine energies. She may not always be outwardly feminine, but she shows up as herself, unapologetically. 

Nurture, caregiver, and mother have historically been associated as feminine traits, while, direct, assertive, and controlling have been seen as more masculine. We all have a balance. Rather than feeling the need to swap one out for the other, embracing one’s self through multiple identities can enhance character.

Stanton provided some advice for younger generations. We have the ability to choose who we want to be and how we present ourselves. Stanton recommends examining the parts of yourself that are holding you back. Are you showing up as your true self? Or are you hiding parts of you to make others comfortable? Either way, it’s important to not beat yourself up for every little thing and just be as authentically you (however masculine or feminine you would like) as possible. 

You can learn more about Amy: 

Website: http://stanton-company.com/ 

Book: The Feminine Revolution

Podcast:

https://insightoutshow.dreamhosters.com/podcast/how-to-use-masculine-energy-to-enhance-feminine-energy-amy-stanton/

Rooted in His Past, but, Not Restricted by it

May 17, 2021 by Billy Samoa Saleebey
General
blind, business, CEO, change, chief strategist, Chris Do, culture, design, teacher, the futur

Chris Do is an Emmy award-winning designer, director, CEO & Chief Strategist of Blind, a brand strategy design consultancy, and founder of The Futur—an online education platform. There is no shortage of words to describe Chris. What word does Chris feel best describes him at this point in his life? Teacher. Do takes us through his past, uncovering key insights that shaped who he is today.

What impact did being born to immigrant parents have?

Do’s parent’s decision to flee Saigon in 1975 led him to develop the necessary skill set and ability to adapt to change. Being born to immigrant parents, habits, ideas, and beliefs were passed down from traumatic events. Such awareness has enabled Chris to be “rooted in his past, but not restricted by it”. With an immense amount of gratitude for the United States and opportunity to start over, Chris has taken on the mindset that you get to pick and choose the best parts of yourself and don’t have to hold on to the parts that you don’t love.

His parents have been among the most influential in his life. Courage and determination are a couple of words Chris uses to describe them. Without obtaining a college education in the United States, Do’s dad worked his way up from being a busboy at a restaurant, not being able to speak English, to ultimately retiring as the chief engineer at a semiconductor company in Silicon Valley.

The role birth order played

Being the middle child to two working parents, Chris became self-reliant. He was able to explore who he was, using mindfulness tactics to observe his thoughts. Do attributes part of his drive and desire to not getting what he wanted as a child.

“The child dies and a man was born”

When Do was around 18 years old he found himself in a toxic relationship. To top it off, he was arguing with his brother, and met with discouragement when his mom suggested giving up on his dream to go to private school. After spiraling down a dark path, Do was able to snap out of it and became determined to prove each and every doubter wrong. He was going to do whatever it took to put himself through college. A switch was flipped, and as Chris describes, “the child dies and a man was born”. This point of inflection shaped his future endeavors. 

“If you want to be a better teacher be a better student. If you want to be a better student, be a better teacher.”

Do was highly influenced by his Philosophy 101 instructor. His professor wrote a book with a series of short stories that built upon complex ideas. Chris thought highly of the fact he never told the class what to think, and asked really good questions. 

How can being a loud introvert be an advantage?

When afraid or too drained to talk to people, Chris turned to himself. His inner dialogue game became strong. Chris claims, “when your mouth is moving, you can’t be learning.” By listening, he was able to learn more.  Do suggests that while we all need practice speaking, articulating, and leading, we should spend the rest of our time paying attention to how we, and others, are thinking, feeling, and responding. The lense is never perfectly clear, we all bring biased opinions. Aiming to be an objective observer, Chris highlights the importance of being more intentional in what we listen to. “Is this the person I want to attract?” Our mind is a sacred place and we have to be a bouncer, controlling what goes in and out. With this practice, Chris has learned to tune out raw energy and emotion, and decipher feedback.

How has the ability to adapt to change served in business pursuits?

Chris attributes Blind’s longevity to the team’s ability to adapt. Accustomed to change from moving nearly every year and a half as a child, Do was able to pivot Blind’s direction when new opportunities arose. Chris has built a high pain tolerance, enabling him to change course rather than being stuck in old ways. Paying attention to culture, trends, and movement has lended well throughout his career. Although Do has had many successes, he emphasizes there isn’t always a straight path, and he is no stranger to failed attempts.

Make a living doing what you love

After crossing most things off his list, Chris didn’t find himself enjoying the services industry anymore. He was missing his purpose and wanted to teach, leading to the formation of The Futur in 2016. Do is not in it for the money. “There are a lot easier ways for [him] to make money”. He is trying to do something to change education as we know it. The Futur’s mission is to teach 1 billion people how to make a living doing what they love. “Living” does not define “money”, allowing each individual to determine the meaning for themselves.

What does Chris want to be known for?

“Dad created opportunity for us” and “he never told us what to do”. A lot of parents raise children to correct sins of the past, living vicariously through them. Chris believes he is exactly who he is supposed to be because he was able to explore who he was. He has made mistakes along the way, but, they have pointed him back into the direction of doing the right thing.

Websites:

https://thefutur.com/

Blind.com

https://taplink.cc/thechrisdo

Social Media:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-b3c7kxa5vU-bnmaROgvog/videos

Clubhouse: @thechrisdo

https://www.linkedin.com/in/thechrisdo/

https://twitter.com/theChrisDo

https://www.instagram.com/thechrisdo/

Book:

Pocket Full of Do

Podcasts:

The Futur Podcast with Chris Do

Chris Do on Business Survival Skills During Change
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Insight Out is a show dedicated to insights that can change your life. World changers, best-selling authors, entrepreneurs, and thought leaders share powerful insights, reveal why they make an impact, and explain exactly how they can be applied in your life.

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